Another morning, as I sat upon my bed, pen at your fingertips and journal in my lap doing things i do most mornings, write down my thoughts and capture early morning musings, my attention was diverted to a large dredge ship that went slowly past my bedroom window. It drifted into my visual view and caught attention, as do most ships that pass by our home in the shipping channel behind us. They're huge and rather tough to miss, the deep rumbling sound of these engines warn of the approach long before they may be seen; their massive size fills the whole view from our window. This kind of morning it was a speed boat even more slow than these as it chugged along doing it's work washing the channel. - LED Dredge Lights
A dredge ship is really quite small as compared to the other ships that frequently sail through behind us for the reason that channel. It doesn't require the assistance of tug boats just like other large ships and freighters since it drifts through the channel, slowly doing its work cleaning up the silt and sludge in the bottom of the waterway.
I watched it chug along, slowly and purposefully. It went by so slowly that I was able to capture a picture of it. As I focused upon the ship, the language "Dredge up the past" floated into my consciousness; an appealing idea to ponder and talk about. It is what I do, take events that show up in everyday life and see them in writing!
But what did which means that to me? Why would that filter into my consciousness at this very moment? I would suppose it absolutely was the word DREDGE, which, after all the ship was doing just that, dredging up the past, stirring the old, built up sludge and clearing it. I stood there watching the ship pass and wondered what are the word really supposed to me and initially another word floated into my thoughts... the word dread. Somehow dredge and dread were connected.
I know I'm not the only one who thinks so. The idea of dredging something up seems heavy and dreary; something which we would dread. Yet is it, or better yet, does it need to be? I think not...
I found myself asking several key questions... "Okay self, how come I equate dredging up the past with dread?"
Is my past really everything dark, painful or dreadful?
Do I only dredge up past hurts, misgivings or failings and rehash them as if they were still present today? Are we unable to let them go and move ahead?
Are the voices during my head telling me the facts as they say over and over which i screwed up or could have done better? Who is that yacking away as if the news was so important it would have to be recorded in the annals of history?
Do I regret certain moments within my life and avidly really wish i could have a "do-over"?
When I am reminded of my past could it be with pleasure and happiness or do I more often than not find it is by using discomfort, sadness or regret?
Goodness, seems pretty darned heavy doesn't it? And again, I understand I am not alone. I've heard this thing from clients, friends and household too. Why is it that we dredge in the past with such heaviness and misgivings? So what happened to those happy moments?
I'm sure it depends on your nature regardless of whether you dredge with dread or with pleasure; whether you do so with zeal or angst. For most of us it is a family pattern, as if it's imprinted in our DNA. However, I additionally believe that we all have aspects of our past we would just rather forget ever happened but often those are the things we will replay in our heads over and over or others gladly emphasize them!
If you are much like me and you naturally or habitually dredge up your past with dread or apprehension, how about instead you approach your past such as the dredge ship approaches the sludge, mud and silt? It's sole purpose and job would be to clean it up; to create forth the earth in the bottom of the channel and take away it. It is a powerful machine that removes the unwanted and destructive, leaving in their wake a clean, purified, clear waterway. It uses whatever tools it must get the job done and does it.
What if we took about the powerful stance just like the ship? After all we too are powerful machines (human machines) so we have the power and talent to stir up, bring it forth, admit it and clean it up! Overlook it. Release it forever, and in it's wake, leave an obvious, clean, purified pathway. You can forget dread. No more heaviness. - LED Dredge Lights